帮我修改下英语作文

帮我修改下英语作文
帮我修改下英语作文

帮我修改下英语作文
正式英语体罸叫做caning( 鞭打) 或是 corporal punishment(体罸),所以要把所有 sticks / stick punishments 换上 canings / corporal punishments.

以下是我给你更正:
Nowadays, many people think that corporal punishments should be used in support to educate kids. First, they think that to some extent, caning is an effective and direct way of educating young children(避免重复kids) because they(同样理由) are too young to control themselves. Secondly, It would be a good idea that parents use corporal punishments to support the rules they made so that they can lead their kids' life to the right tracks(後部几个字是我替你加上的,你可以自己考虑是否需要). Thirdly, they believe what they have done to them, were just showing their love.
In my opinion, I would not agree with it at all and think that corporal punishments in education is just a short-sighted idea. Every chid is unique in their own way(各自有各自的特长,代替in the world) and they don't need to have the same objective to become (或用turn into) the best kid!
I approve of a proper punishment when kids made mistakes, but it shouldn't be too much and also must care about the kids' own feelings!

很希望我替你的修改能够令你满意.
请注意的是: 我多照原句,但亦有些字的删改、加或减.

写得很好啊。。没啥大问题
第二行punishment你想说的是肉体惩罚吧 加个physical最好
第三行上来 “the kids”the 去掉 ，然后 are usually too ..
第五行 如果你真想表达believe in 而不是believe 的话 一定要在in 和 what 之间加上that
倒数第四行。。they don't need to h...

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写得很好啊。。没啥大问题
第二行punishment你想说的是肉体惩罚吧 加个physical最好
第三行上来 “the kids”the 去掉 ，然后 are usually too ..
第五行 如果你真想表达believe in 而不是believe 的话 一定要在in 和 what 之间加上that
倒数第四行。。they don't need to have the same objective to be the best就行了
倒数第三行the还是去掉吧。。
倒数第二行上来掉了be 后面 their kids
最后feelings
大半夜，纯手打。。困死了，给分吧少年~

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1'首先所有分点的序数词之后都应加ly
2'第一段最后一句believe后面引导宾语从句 但你加了in后面只能跟词 应该去掉in
3'最后一段shouldn t后面少了be
4'最后一句if only你是想用虚拟语气吗 过去式没有体现 not前面加would

Third,the reason that makes them believe in what have done to their kids is Love
the same objective which is being the best.
I approve of a proper punishment on children who make mistakes,if o...

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Third,the reason that makes them believe in what have done to their kids is Love
the same objective which is being the best.
I approve of a proper punishment on children who make mistakes,if only this punishment is not much severe,and if the parents care about both the kid's feelings and their own ones when they hold sticks against their children
字写这么秀气是女孩吧

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Nowadays, many people support using sticks to educate kids. Firstly, they think punishment is an effective and direct way of educating kids, to some extent, because the kids are too ...

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Nowadays, many people support using sticks to educate kids. Firstly, they think punishment is an effective and direct way of educating kids, to some extent, because the kids are too young to control themselves. Secondly, for parents’ part, it would be a great idea to use sticks to support the rules they have made so that the life of children could be taken under theirs control. Thirdly, they believe that what they have done to their kids are out of love.
I can’t agree with them, personally. Sticking education is just a shortsighted way. Every child is unique in the world, so they don’t need to be forced to hold the same pursuit of being the best child as their top goal.
It doesn’t hurt for kids to be punished properly when making mistakes, but the punishment shouldn’t be too much. And it would be much better if parents who believe sticking education not only think about themselves, but also care about the kids’ feeling.

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第三行，去掉the，第二个观点语法有些动词时态有误，且句子逻辑不对。
第五行，去掉in。
第六行，because of 改成 due to 会比较好。
第七行，第一句话似乎是中文式的翻译及理解，in my opinion与I can't agree with them 虽然句意不同，其实暗含的是同一个意思，为了避免啰嗦，取其一即可。
第八行，they前加上连词so。...

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第三行，去掉the，第二个观点语法有些动词时态有误，且句子逻辑不对。
第五行，去掉in。
第六行，because of 改成 due to 会比较好。
第七行，第一句话似乎是中文式的翻译及理解，in my opinion与I can't agree with them 虽然句意不同，其实暗含的是同一个意思，为了避免啰嗦，取其一即可。
第八行，they前加上连词so。
第九行，too much 改为 be too serious。not only 前加could，虚拟语气。their own 改为themselves。
第十行，feeling后加s。

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